HOW TO LOOK LIKE A DOMESTIC GODDESS WITHOUT WORKING LIKE ONE

On occasion, my friends have referred to me as a domestic goddess. Although I am always flattered by these comments, I feel a little bit dishonest. My dear friends, it is time that I finally came clean. Domestic goddess I am not. Overwhelmed wife, mother, and homemaker who finds the shortest cuts possible is more like it. These “short cuts,” are simple things that I have adopted over the years. I’d like to share a few of these with you so you too can appear to be a domestic goddess.


Cookies Anyone?
Nothing says homemaker better than a warm batch of cookies fresh from the oven. Who has time to put together the dough and watch over the oven after a long day of work? Work being a job that pays you, and/or the task of keeping your children from killing each other. (Not mine of course, they’re little angels) Solution…whenever you find yourself in the mood, make a large batch of cookie dough and roll them into small little balls. Spread them out on a cookie sheet and put them in the freezer until they are no longer sticky. Then throw them into a large ziplock bag or glass container and put back in the freezer. When you have unexpected visitors, or are just in the mood yourself, take a few out and bake at 350 degrees for 13 minutes or so. Sure I just spent an entire paragraph telling you about cookies, but you’ll love how this simple thing can make you look great.

Crockpot Paradox
When my husband and I first got married, we had the pleasure of using a scan gun to zap away at our department store wish list. As I approached the two gallon crock pot, gun ready to fire, my husband seemed to think we didn’t need such a large one. I explained that we could throw large parties or bathe our future children in it. Should have guessed then that marrying a 6’7 man would not provide me children that would fit. From this large crockpot a paradox occurs. It’s an appliance that allows you to throw food into it and then push a button that spends all day cooking for you. Brilliant! Yet with very little work, spouses and guests seem to be impressed by whatever comes out of the magic box. It’s a win-win really. So please, dust off that old crockpot and let it make you look like you’ve been slaving away over dinner all day.

Thank you. No, thank you!
I’d have to say that 90 % of my mail is recycled without ever being read. The other 10% are bills that are still sent to me via snail mail. However, every once in a while a bright star will appear. It doesn’t look like a bill, it has handwriting on it, and I sit with giddy anticipation on what it could be. Feverishly, I open the letter to find a sweet thank you card from a friend for something very small I did for her. None-the-less, this made me feel loved and admiration for someone who took the time out of their busy life to purchase a card, hand write me a note, rummage around for a stamp, and then manage to mail the darn thing. The phrase, “It’s the thought that counts” doesn’t apply when you just think about sending a card to someone. So here’s a simple way to get it done. Purchase numerous thank-you cards at one time. You can collect them when they are on sale or just pick up a pack of ten. Then write your return address on them, put on a stamp, and store them in your kitchen junk drawer. If one were to have such a thing. You are now three-fourths of the way there when wanting to thank someone for their kindness. It shows people love and makes you look like you really have your act together.

Just the way my mom’s mom made it.
Most of us did not grow up in a home where fresh baked bread was the norm. However, with modern technology we can bring this tradition back. I can’t begin to tell you how many compliments I have gotten over my homemade bread. The oohs and aahs are something I absolutely love to hear... especially since I’m not the best cook. I won’t go into great detail on my bread making journey since you can read all about it in a previous article entitled, Not By Bread Alone…Need Bread Maker. The point I want to share is that it’s not me people should be praising, but my bread maker. I simply throw a few ingredients in it and push a button, yet I am the one who gets to look like Martha Stewart. I’m seriously considering hiding my bread maker. I don’t want people to see the little woman standing behind a curtain pushing a button, but rather the Great Wizard of Bread.

Fake it.
The shortest cut of all…fake it. Some domestic goddesses seem to always have their stuff together. They appear to have everything under control. This is probably where the lawyer in me comes out. If you look confident and say things with confidence, people will have confidence in you. Whether any of that is true or not, is a different story. If you act like you have things together, people will believe it. Now I don’t mean having your hair and make-up done. For those of you who see my smiling face, you will surely not see make-up on it. In fact, you don’t want to see me with make-up on. If I’m wearing my war paint, it probably means I’m in court representing you on a criminal matter. Looking like you have things together really just means taking everything in stride. Your muffins got burnt on the bottom? Serve muffin tops! Your child throws a fit in the store? Simply speak softly and carry them out like they were just an item on your list. The longer you fake taking things in stride, the more likely you are actually to do it. Before you know it, you look like you have everything under control because you do! Being in control doesn’t mean planning everything that happens in your life, it means having a plan for how you’ll react to things that happen in your life.